Cheyenne, Wyo. (KGWN) The following information is courtesy Dick Berry of Youth Alternatives.
One of Dick's favorite quotes:
"You can't talk your way out of problems you behave yourself into."
1. If your behavior got you into trouble, you have to change your
behavior to get out of trouble. Talking won't get you out of the hole.
This is true whether you are an adult or child.
- If you have been an absent Dad or Mom, it doesn't work to tell your
child you will now see him a lot and bring gifts.
- If your child gets suspended frequently because of his anger, it
doesn't work to apologize and not control his anger.
2. Don't over promise and under perform.
-Because you feel badly and you really want things to get better
quickly, it is easy to promise more than you can deliver. It starts great,
but you can't sustain what you promised, so your word loses
credibility. Absent Parent:
- If you can only consistently call your child twice a month, don't
promise weekly calls. Consistency and predictability are important,
that is how trust
3. Quit talking and take consistent action.
- Angry child
- Promising to never be angry again won't work.
- Instead of blowing up, he walks to the tree by the fence.
- Each time he controls his anger, people start to believe he can do it.
- Stick with it. Be patient as it may take people a little bit of time to
believe that you have changed.
- People will believe what you do, not what you say.